Profound Question

She asked it on the way from the airport to the hotel. It was after the 27 hours of travel and my poor little brain was barely functioning. It took me totally by surprise. It showed an astounding connection being made in the mind of a 6 year old little girl with a complicated life history. "Mommy, why she not have a mommy and a daddy and a sister and a brother?" I was not prepared for this question. And I had no answer. I stumbled, and tried to say something coherent and honest, yet not scary and presumptive. I tried "Well, honey, I think she HAD parents once, called birthparents." At which point, practical Mary Alice broke in and said "MOM, of COURSE she had birth parents, everyone does!" Uh, yeah, that's true.. I guess what you want to know is why she is not with them. And that is something I just don't know. Practical Eric, says "That's what we're for. WE are her family, now." Megan is completely satisfied with this answer, for now. I am sure the time will come when she will want and need to know more.

I try to tell Megan her story often. It goes something like this.....

Once upon a time there was a little girl named Min Bao Ling. She lived far across the world in the north of China, in a City called Chaoyang. She lived there with lots of other little children and they were cared for every day by nannies.  On the other side of the world a mommy and a daddy, who had two children already, said "We think we should have another child in our family. Let's write a letter to China and ask them if we can adopt one of their children who need a family. So they did, and China sent them a letter back, telling them to come to China and meet their child. Her name was Min Bao Ling.

Min Bao Ling was a cheerful, happy three year old girl who was always curious. Early one morning, Nanny woke her up in the dark of the night and said it was time to meet her new mama and baba. Nanny also woke up her good friend, Bao Bao. The girls dressed and ate, then they got on a big bus with their Nanny and rode many hours through the Chinese countryside. They arrived at a very big building with lots of stairs. They went inside and up an elevator. Neither of the girls had ever been on a bus OR an elevator before and they were quiet and watchful, holding Nanny's hand. They went into a large room with a BIG table and waited.  There were other people with children. Some were quiet, some were crying, some were happy. Min Bao Ling and Bao Bao were curious about everything and looked around, wondering what would happen next. Min Bao Ling noticed a man and a woman watching her. The man came over and tried to give Min Bao Ling a backpack with a doll in it. Min Bao Ling was shy and shook her head. The man took a tiny little bear out of the bag and gave in to her. She smiled and hugged it. Soon the woman came over and told Min Bao Ling "Wo Shirne dah mama" "I am your mama". Mama had Smarties in her pocket and gave them to Min Bao Ling. Min Bao Ling smiled a BIG smile and kissed and hugged her new mama. She was very, very happy.

Megan loves to hear her story. She often adds details that I forget and joins in the story thread. As she gets older, I will continue to add details about her past, as I know them, but there is not much more I know. She was found when she was 30 days old, and was very tiny, only 6 pounds. She was taken to and cared for by the orphanage right away, and had lived there ever since. She was very weak and took 6 months to recover enough strength to hold her head up on her own. But she had a strong spirit and her engaging personality helped her to be resilient and make emotional connections that sustained her. Min Bao Ling knew Love.

I don't know much more for Shanna. She was found at 6 years old, with an unknown and undiagnosed underactive thyroid, that had advanced so much that she had stopped growing for a few years and was very sick. I don't know for sure, but I think her parents probably knew something was wrong and they could not help her for whatever reason. Many people here have very limited resources, especially in the countryside. Luckily for Shanna, her condition was very treatable. Also, a very resilient child, she responded quickly to medication and loving care. Luckily for her, she was placed in an orphanage and foster care home that are supported by Love Without Boundaries, an American support agency that assists orphaned children in China. She received excellent care and started to thrive and grow again. Now, though tiny, she is a happy, loving, gentle and also very curious nine year old girl.

Who will soon have a mommy, a daddy, a brother, and TWO sisters, and she will have a story of her own.

Posted by Linda and Megan, who both have slept enough and are ready to meet Shanna!